Many Deaths Of Mike

The Many Deaths of Mike
I first met Mike when just a lad.
He'd stabbed a witch cuz she was bad.
That just served to make her mad.
She cursed poor Mike to live

When we returned to his hometown,
We saw a sight that brought him down
It seemed his family all had drowned!
So Mike, he killed himself.

(chorus)
Mike he died in a horrible way.
He'll probably die again today.
How he'll go I cannot say.
The many deaths of Mike

One day Mike found a dungeon true,
he lost his way in darkness too.
He was eaten by a grue!
But somehow he came back.

(chorus)

When Mike was in a dark stone maze
a beholder caught him in its gaze.
One eye two eye three eye rays,
and Mike was dead again.

(chorus)

When Mike and crew on ship set sail,
they thought they'd find a peaceful whale.
Instead a kraken ends the tale
of all except poor Mike

(chorus)

He once crushed on a girl named Sue.
Her master's cave she led him to.
It belonged to a dragon blue,
and it bit off his head.

(chorus)

Mike was there when the centaurs hit.
He hid and no one saw one bit.
When he slipped in blood and shit
they trampled him to death.

(chorus)

When minotaur and man did brawl
While Mike, the cursed, away did crawl
The minotaur pierced him like an awl
And then crushed him to death.

(chorus)

Mike was in his Sunday best
He then put on a vest
It was a mimic. Who'd have guessed
Mike was eaten again!

(chorus)

Mike spent time in a dragon's lair
A-thinkin' it sure don't seem fair
That he would lose all of his hair
When he turned up crispy-fried!

(chorus)

Now Mike's been dying everyday.
The witch is dead it's fair to say
but poor Mike's curse won't go away!
But he serves a damn fine beer!

(chorus)
Mike keeps dying every day
He just can't keep himself away!
How he'll go I cannot say.
The many deaths of Mike

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